Thursday, May 6, 2010

How Many Little Kids Can You Squeeze Into One House?

You probably know that I take care of Rafael every day before and after school, giving me a total of three kids under seven in my care. You may also know that I do extra babysitting in the community, for other families, to make money. One of the families I babysit for, the Joneses, have two little girls named Miranda and Eloise who are five and two. Miranda has ADHD and Aspergers Syndrome. I usually watch the girls every other Saturday night.
However, the Joneses had to go to an IEP meeting for Miranda today. They wanted to be able to go together, for moral support, because their daughter is entering kindergarten and this was their first IEP meeting for her. So, they asked if they could drop Miranda and Eloise off at my house after school today!
I was a little nervous, because that would bring me to a total of five kids under seven years old to keep track of... including three with ADHD, one with Aspergers, and two with the Terrible Two's! Talk about a wild bunch!
But the trampoline saved the day! Every family with sensory seekers needs one of these!


I also orchestrated an art project, I had the kids decorate fun foam picture frames. Tomorrow I'm going to print out photos of each of them, paste them into the frames, and let the kids give them to their moms for Mother's Day! Look at the little art class I have here!


After art, we went inside for a snack, and then down to the playroom for some dress-up fun. The afternoon was a total success! When Mrs. Jones came to pick up the girls, Miranda and Eloise were both chattering about all the fun they had had!

One somewhat related thing that is frustrating me right now is something about Little Bear's upcoming birthday party. Her birthday is in July, but she's having a party for the kids in her class at the end of May, at a lazer tag place. She's invited every kid in her class... except for three.
The three she didn't give invitations to were the kids who come to her class from the special education class for parts of the day.
When Diana asked Little Bear why she had crossed out the names of these three kids, Little Bear explained that they didn't have "mailboxes" in her classroom so they hadn't been able to get invitations. Diana offered to call the teacher and ask the teacher to make sure these three  kids got invitations. Little Bear balked! She protested that the three kids "don't know how to play" and "can't even really talk." Diana persisted, saying Little Bear should invite them, and that even if they didn't play lazer tag, they might enjoy just coming and eating pizza with us, and they'd probably feel good about being invited. Little Bear still protested, saying she didn't want to invite them. Then Diana got distracted by Pufferfish getting out of the bathtub, so the conversation never finished.
I am frustrated because I definitely don't want Little Bear to be one of those kids who excludes others because of their special needs. I try very hard to get her to accept everyone. That was one reason why I was glad to have her play with Miranda today, and why I encourage her to play with Billy at the park. I want her to get used to seeing and playing with kids who act in ways that are different from what she is used to.
One day at the park a girl was pushing Billy on the swing, and Billy fell off. The girl and Rafael laughted and exchanged high fives. I was about ready to strangle Rafael! I dragged him and Little Bear aside and lectured them that, first of all, it is never okay to laugh when someone else is hurt or being made fun of, and second of all, that since they knew Billy, they should stick up for him against other kids. They seemed to understand, and Little Bear was adnamant that she had not laughed when Billy fell off the swing.
But she doesn't want to include the kids from the special ed class in her birthday party.
If it was my choice, I would make her invite them, and then if they came to the party I would make sure they were included as much as possible. But its not my choice, its up  to Diana, so I'm sort of nervous to see how that turns out!
What would you do, how would you feel, if you were on either side of this story? (Either the parent of the child having the birthday, or the parent of the child from the special education class?)

2 comments:

Adelaide Dupont said...

Hopefully Diana will agree with you.

Trampolines are still awesome.

It's good to see you're teaching the kids values.

If I were a parent, I probably would not invite the whole class. I would invite the kids who invited my kid to parties; an arbitary number based on the kid's age (like 5 or 7) or let the kid pick three and I pick three.

Or probably not have invitations at all and have an open house so that everyone who wants to can come.

Michelle said...

sounds like you did a great job handling all those kids!

Kayla also has a July bday but I haven't had a 'school' party for her so I haven't had to deal with how many to invite from the class. I think that is tricky because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by not inviting them, but then again the whole class is large for a younger child's bday party. I've read the 'rule of thumb' should be the amount of kids = to child's age...but then again how do you pick only a handful out of class. Maybe she is uncomfortable inviting them because they only spend a short amount of time in the classroom so she hasn't had a chance to get to know them that well. Its good that you are encouraging friendships with all different kids though!

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